My friend XX is in therapy and feeling much better overall. In one discussion with her therapist, she said,
When I tell you how crazy my family is, I feel bad. I think, 'Who am I to be judging them?' They are probably saying that I'm the crazy one.
Her question seems to be, "How do I know that my perception and judgements of sanity are reliable and fair?"
Her therapist said,
The fact that you're wondering is a good sign that you are able to see a perspective other than your own. You can see more than one possible interpretation. People with personality disorders often think that there is nothing wrong with them. Everyone else is crazy or stupid or evil. Your ability to ask -- is it me or them -- suggests that it is not you.
Meanwhile, the crazy person knows with absolute certainty that it is everyone else.DISCLAIMER: My friend and I used the word "crazy" -- and in the context of our friendship and understanding of one another, we knew what we meant. I would not casually use that word as it has far too many meanings.